What are some non-sleazy networking strategies? We're going to cover this today and a whole lot more on the Inside VS Show. Join us. Hey now, I'm Nikki G. This is the Inside VS Show.

I'm here this morning with Dave Lorenzo, the godfather of growth. Morning, Dave. Hey now, Nikki G. Great to see you.

I love your radio voice. It is fantastic and I love this topic, non-sleazy networking strategies. Let's get into it.

All right, Dave, let's get into it. What's non-sleazy networking strategy number one? Non-sleazy networking strategy number one is deliver value first. So let's say you met somebody and you know they're a good complimentary partner for you.

You know that you can do business together. There's stuff you can refer to them. There's stuff they can refer to you.

You want to open up the relationship. You've already bonded. You've already got rapport.

So delivering value first is critical. And there are three ways that I like to deliver value to people with whom I'm networking. The first way, of course, is making a connection to someone who can either do business with that person or refer business to that person.

Here's a great example. So if I meet Nicola at a networking event and we hit it off, we've got great rapport, we've bonded. I go back to my office and I'm thinking, who's a great person for me to introduce to Nicola? So obviously, general counsel at a large company would be a great introduction.

But you know what? I need to get to know her first a little bit. So here's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna introduce Nicola to a transactional attorney who only does corporate transactional work.

And why am I gonna do that? Because those people often have litigation matters and they refer the litigation matters to people who do just litigation work. So I call up Nicola and I go, hey, I really liked the conversation we had at the event the other day. Would it be valuable for me to introduce you to my friend Brian, who's a corporate transactional attorney.

He does mergers and acquisitions work. He does simple corporate formation work. He often has litigation matters that he refers out.

Nicola, would that be a good introduction for you? And Nicola would be, she'd be thrilled. She'd say, sure, thank you for thinking of me. I'm flattered.

I set up a lunch. I introduced Brian to Nicola at the lunch. So that's a way to deliver value first before asking for anything.

So that's non-sleazy networking strategy number one, deliver value first. Nicola, let's look at non-sleazy networking strategy number two. What's one that you really like? Non-sleazy networking strategy number two involves LinkedIn.

It's a great platform when you use it effectively. Do not send that cold email, reaching out to someone, immediately asking for a meeting or selling your services. You've heard us say this before, very important tip.

The way you can establish a cold connection on LinkedIn is by getting involved in the space where the contacts are that you would like to make an introduction to. So engage in content, comment on content that shows that you have an established knowledge in that space. Those people who you are looking to reach out to will now recognize you as someone who's engaging, someone who also has knowledge in that space, and they'll be much more open to a warm, to a reach out by you when you want to make that connection.

So eventually you'll feel that the time is right to do so, reach out and you'll be surprised. Now you've already established a bit warmer of a connection rather than an initial cold reach out. I love that.

And LinkedIn is so valuable. You can scroll through people's past posts and discover what they're into. And that is a fantastic way to open up that conversation and it makes it, it gives the appearance that you actually are interested in the other person because you took the time to look through their posts to see what they were into.

I love it. That's fantastic. Great strategy number two.

Non-sleazy networking strategy number three is ask important, empathetic questions. Now, what does that mean? Okay, so here's my opening line, right? If I were like a business pickup artist, this would be the line that I would teach everybody because it works every time. Hi, my name is Dave.

What's your name? By the way, if you don't say, what's your name, the person's not gonna tell you what their name is. It happens like that all the time. Hi, my name is Dave.

What's your name? They're gonna tell you what their name is. And then you're gonna say, oh, your name's Nicola. Okay, great.

What do you do for work? Or what do you do for a living? If you wanna be more formal, what do you do for work? And then Nicola is gonna say to me, oh, I'm a lawyer. I'm a business litigator. And then no matter what they say to that answer, you say, that's fascinating.

How did you get into that? Oh, you're a business litigator? That's fascinating. How did you get into that? You do creditor's rights work? That's fascinating. How did you get into that? What, you follow the elephant around with a shovel? That's fascinating.

How did you get into that? No matter what they say, that's interesting. That's fascinating. Hmm, really good stuff.

How did you get into that? That opens the door for them to then tell you their origin story or how they got into what they're doing. And then feel free to say, that's really cool. Tell me a little bit more.

If they give you a short answer, that's really cool. Tell me a little bit more. Or that's really cool.

What do you like the most about that? That's really cool. How did you come to join that company? That's really cool. How are you finding things given the current economy? All of those questions continue to open the door, continue to allow them to keep talking.

Now, as the conversation goes on, if you wanna find out more about them or if you wanna really strive to deepen the relationship, you can make it a little bit personal. And you can say something like, do you have any good plans for the weekend? You got anything going on this weekend? Or you can ask about the three staples that everyone loves to talk about. Those are kids, pets, or hobbies.

Everybody has either a kid or a pet or a hobby. The people who don't have kids or pets or hobbies, they're psychopaths. You need to run as fast as you can away from them because they got one of the three at least, right? So if they don't have kids, no problem.

You got any pets? No, no problem. Oh, what are your hobbies? What do you do for fun? That's the one I always start with. I always start with, hey, what do you do for fun? What are your hobbies? And if they have kids or pets, they'll say, oh, I got two big dogs.

I spend like an hour and a half a day walking the dogs. Oh, what type of dogs? What breed? How did you decide on what breed to get? Oh, they were rescues and we saw them. We fell in love with them.

Or they'll say, I shuttle my kids from practice to and from practice every day. You know, kids, pets, and hobbies, always good conversation starters. Start with what do you do for fun? What do you do in your spare time? What do you do in your free time? Or what do you do when you're not working? Those questions will allow them to open up and talk a little bit more about what they do outside of work.

So, Nicola, what are some of your favorite questions to ask when you're meeting someone in a networking event? I like to ask them how they got involved in that particular group or event that you're at. It's always an easy opener, and it's a great way to already establish an immediate connection with that person. And from there, you can also relate to the experience you're having.

You know, perhaps you're there at a breakfast meeting. Hey, did you have the muffin or the coffee? It's really great this morning. Now you've already established another point of connection.

So I like to find common ground, and I do that by asking questions where we've already shared some experiences leading up to that point in time when I walk up to the person and make that initial contact. That's terrific, I love that. If you came up to me and you said the muffins were really good, I would go get a muffin right away because you don't need to twist my arm to get breakfast pastry.

All right, another networking tip. Moving on to the next networking tip now. I think we're up to networking tip number three, if I'm not mistaken.

That is bring a wing person with you. Bring a wing person with you. I was gonna say wing man, but I wanna be, you know, gender neutral, right? So bring your wing person with you.

And one of my favorite wing people is Nikki G. I love to go to networking events with you, Nicola, because what I can do then is walk up to someone and go, hi, my name is Dave, what's your name? They say, my name is Joe. Let me introduce you to my friend, Nicola. She's a business litigator, and she's a really good lawyer.

Joe, what do you do? And then Joe will introduce himself. He'll ask Nicola a couple of questions about her. Nicola will ask Joe a couple of questions about him.

And I'm just sitting there on the sidelines, taking it all in. Eventually, somebody will turn to me and go, who the hell are you and what do you do? And then I'll get to say who I am and what I do. But what it does when there's a third person there, especially when you bring that person with you, it takes the pressure off of both of you at a networking event.

My favorite thing to do, especially if you're an introvert, which I'm not, but if you are, bring a wing person with you and you introduce them to the other person and they can introduce you. The second thing a wing person is really good for, and Nicola, I know you're gonna love this. If you get trapped in a conversation, your wing person can come over and go, hey, Nicola, can I borrow you for a minute? And then Nicola can go, oh, excuse me, Dave wants to talk to me for a minute or Dave has somebody he needs to connect me with or Dave needs me for a sec.

It was great speaking with you. I'll see you later. And then I can pull you away from the person who's bending your ear trying to sell you a copy or get you to convert your credit card processing or do whatever they're trying to do.

So the wing person is a phenomenal networking tool. What do you think? I agree. It is very important to have a professional wing person with you, especially if you're going to a larger event.

It allows you to work through the room quicker. It allows you to have warmer openings with people. It's almost like you said, you kind of already have a conversation going because you know one of the two people in that conversation that's about to happen.

It's a more natural opening when you're in that circumstance. It also allows that other person when they're introducing you who knows you to say good things about you. You can't stand and say great things about yourself.

It just doesn't, it's not a good look, but it's great to have someone there who knows you well because why? It's genuine what they're saying. They do know you. They're saying those things because they believe those things.

And it's really great to have that warm intro where someone else is making an introduction for you to someone new. And from there, you know, I love that you segue right into, tell us about you. And now that person's already feeling comfortable and it makes for a really warm connection.

I think you're right. I think that's absolutely terrific. So non-sleazy networking strategy number four is suspend judgment.

And that goes right along with non-sleazy networking strategy number three. You know, the person may have a specific opinion or they may have a chip on their shoulder or they may just be having a bad day. And they might start off with a little bit of an edge to them.

And candidly, at a networking event, you just got to kind of suspend your judgment and go with it. What I usually do, if somebody comes off with a little bit of an edge is I like to make some sort of a self-deprecating joke, make a joke about me, and then try to lighten the mood. And then if that doesn't work, I will try something else like, hey, have you tried the muffins? They're really good today.

Or something along the lines of how did you, like Nicola said, how did you come to find this organization? And if that still doesn't work and the person's in a bad mood, I will just kind of excuse myself and move on. Usually the self-deprecating humor will get us out of that loop. I also want to talk about suspending judgment based upon how somebody looks.

Now, I'm not talking about their personal or their physical appearance. Sometimes you'll go to a networking event and a person will be wearing something that is typically a symbol of a group or an organization that you may not have the same ideology as them, right? Or they'll be wearing something that's a little bit outrageous. And you'll probably pass judgment mentally on that person and say, I don't like somebody who wears red pants at a networking event.

I'm gonna stay away from that person. They dress a little bit funny. I think you should suspend judgment on that.

And here's the reason why. You don't know what's going on in that person's mind. I specifically used red pants because that's an example of something that one of my clients, who's an outstanding networker, does all the time.

He has really loud red pants. He also has a pink jacket that is like the only jacket of its kind you're ever gonna find anywhere. He doesn't wear them together, but he'll wear one of these two things or he'll wear like a really wild tie or something absolutely outrageous as an affectation like a pin on his clothing.

The reason he does that is because those are great conversation starters. People will come up to him and go, man, those pants, did you just get off the golf course? And he's heard all the comments about them a million times and he's got a witty retort and then he immediately introduces himself. He makes himself an object of interest and people will come up to him and talk to him because of the pink jacket or the ridiculous goofy pin or his tie that has like elephants or whales on it.

Like he has that down to a T and he forces himself to network with people because people will come up to him and talk to him. There's a term for this and it's called peacocking. You're basically putting yourself out there with the clothing you wear, with the affectations you have on.

And I would caution you that you've got to do it in a way that still keeps you within the norms or the conventions of business. So for example, I wouldn't wear like a really big, wide brim sombrero to a networking event because it looks a little costumey, it looks a little ridiculous unless it's a Cinco de Mayo event. Like that's too much.

But like a funny colored jacket, a crazy tie or really loud pants, I think those things are okay if you want to connect with someone. But if you're the person approaching, don't hesitate to approach the person who's got the red pants or the funny colored jacket. Suspend your judgment of them, even if they have like some sort of a political pin on or something, suspend your judgment because we have to be able to do business with everyone.

You can't pass judgment on someone just because of how they look. You got to suspend it, you got to get through it, give them a chance to win you over. And then if you talk to them for five minutes and you don't like them, you can move on and talk to somebody else.

But if that person approaches you and they have some sort of an affectation that is a little standoffish, suspend your judgment, get into a conversation because you never know what can come from that conversation. Nikki G, your thoughts. Oh, this is great.

The person that you may have already prejudged could be the best connection in that room for you. And you won't know it if you've already said, this person's not a good connection for me based upon something that they're wearing or something that they're doing. I think many of us who have been doing this for a long time are surprised by who ends up being an excellent connection for us.

Don't make the quick judgment, even if it's not just attire, just don't make the quick judgment. Give that person an opportunity because you really may be missing out if you don't. I couldn't agree more.

Non-sleazy networking strategy number five is follow-up, follow-up, follow-up, but do it in a way that continues to deliver value. So I love follow-up. That's where all the money is.

So if I meet two or three people at a networking event and I get their contact information, my favorite way to follow up, first and foremost, obviously, as I said at the beginning, is to introduce them to somebody. And then I will try and deliver value to them on a regular basis by providing educational content. And candidly, that's why we do this podcast because if we meet someone and we introduce them to somebody else, part of our follow-up process is, hey, let me send you a link to a show where we talked about exactly what you and I talked about at the networking event, right? And then hopefully they subscribe and they listen to the show over and over again, and it's a way for us to stay top of mind with them.

I also write a weekly email newsletter and I put them on that list with their permission afterwards so I stay top of mind with them there. I do a monthly print newsletter. I put them on that list and I send the monthly print newsletter to them.

If I'm hosting an event and I think the event will be valuable to them, I invite them to come to the event and I'm constantly looking to introduce people to one another after I qualify the introduction as a way to continue to deliver value. So many people, Nicola, that I meet go to a networking event and they come home and they say, that was a great event, I met three people, and then they wait for the phone to ring. And that's not the way networking works.

Networking events or when you meet someone one-on-one in the line at Starbucks or at the supermarket and it turns out that they might be a good business partner for you from a client standpoint, they don't just remember you and call you. You need to follow up and continue to deliver value with them over the long term. I have clients that I met eight, nine, 10 years ago who are on my email list for eight, nine, or 10 years and the timing finally is right for them to come to an event and to engage me and work with me.

Follow-up is where all the money is after networking. What do you think, Nikki G? Absolutely, following up with value is critical. You don't know how long it may take for that relationship to really develop into a good client for you.

It could take years. And you've heard this from us before and you will continue to hear this from us that it's about value you are delivering to that person. That helps strengthen your relationship.

You can be thoughtful about, and Dave mentioned sending a newsletter out to his clients that adds value. You can think about them when you're reading an article and you say, you know what? This would be great for that person. We had a conversation about this.

Let me send it to them. Let me also include a note, letting them know I was thinking about them when I read this. Maybe you're a lawyer and in your space, you see a case that would be really helpful to an in-house attorney you've been communicating with.

Send them the case, offer some thoughts on it. It also gives you an opportunity to show some of the legal insight you have indirectly by sending off a piece that is going to be helpful to them. They'll appreciate it.

Be very thoughtful about how you can add value to someone when you're following up, because it's not just reaching out, letting them know you're there. It's about them. And so thinking about how you can provide something to them that's going to make them see that you're someone they want to have a relationship with.

You've provided great value to us today, Nicola, and I wanna continue to have a relationship with you. Thank you for joining us today. This is the Inside CS Show.

If you enjoyed today's show, watch another episode. We're here every day. I'm Nikki G. And you are? I'm the godfather of growth, Dave Lorenzo.

We'll see you back here again tomorrow.